Thursday, February 14, 2008

Speech Therapy, Scrapbooking and Swimming...



I know that this is a strange combination but it really sums up our past month.
Firstly speech therapy... where do I begin? I was informed yesterday by the speech therapist in the boys' hospital group that Mitchell doesn't have verbal dyspraxia he has a language disorder (Harry is to be assessed next week). She said that he uses a lot of learnt phrases to fill in the conversation (which I have long known) and that he really doesn't understand a lot of what we are saying to him. We have now been told that he needs more intensive one on one therapy than the hospital can provide. The funny thing is that just at the beginning of term we got to the top of the public waiting list for our area, but the speech therapists agreed amongst themselves that the boys didn't need two seperate speech therapists ( due to possible confusion for Mitch). So now we are back at square one. Up until now we have paid for a private therapist through our health insurance because the boys weren't deemed to have a significant speech problem initially. Then when we were referred to a Paed when the boys were 2 1/2 years old, he felt the boys needed help with speech and got us into this hospital group and on the Child Development Unit waiting list for ongoing assistance during schooling.

Last night I just fell apart. How much more can I take? I am so tired of never getting a break - it is just one thing after another. I said to my friend yesterday that the moment I went into premature labour there has never been a day without worry - and I am just so bloody tired. I know I shouldn't complain and things could be so much worse, but I feel at breaking point. I don't know what to think. What does this mean for Mitchell? Does he also have an intellectual delay? Will he ever understand? Will speech always be a battle for him? And then how is it that one speech therapist (who has seen him for over a year)has said verbal dyspraxia with good receptive skills and another (who has seen him twice)says no this is wrong he has a language disorder and has poor receptive skills? How as the mother do I know who is right? It's not a rollercoaster - because that has a start and end - this is a merry-go-round where I am forever trapped waiting for the next calamity to strike. How do I get past my tears? And how do I know what to do next?


I DO know that tomorrow I will get up and the boys and I will face whatever challenges are ahead, but I am just so tired.

Now on a lighter note (thank god I hear you cry) scrapbooking - for those of you that know me well you would realise that I LOVE scrapbooking! If I could do it every day I would! Anyway, it seems like the gods have been conspiring against me over the past week because Harry has decided he doesn't want to go to bed. So our nights consist of Kev and I playing tag team putting Harry back to bed until he falls into an exhausted slumber. Now this would be okay except that he insists on screaming endlessly in a pitch that can decalcify the bones! I have no idea why he has started this... maybe it is just a stage, but boy is it exhausting. So by the time he falls asleep I feel to tired to contemplate anything creative so there goes my scrapbooking... However I have manage to complete one layout for the Scrapbooking 4 Less Scraptacular competition - it is of Mitch looking very grown up and serious at Port Vincent.

And finally swimming. I have had great intentions for months to get the boys into a swimming class more for the exercise than anything - maybe it will exhaust Harry so much he will beg me to let him sleep (I dream). But I just can't seem to get motivated. The boys love the pool and so do I - although I have been known to frighten small children as I clamber into their wading pool with both boys. Kev on the other hand doesn't like swimming or pools or the beach at all. Which makes it an interesting exercise when we go to the pool and he doesn't want to swim. Because let me tell you there is nothing more difficult than watching two little children at once in the pool! So for the moment I have decided to put this into the too hard basket. Sounds un-Australian doesn't it. Maybe my boys will be scarred for life with the knowledge that they didn't learn to swim until they were four years old. Or maybe they will be scarred by the mental image of me in bathers! Who knows. I suppose that's the interesting thing about parenting, you never know what is going to happen and how this will come back to haunt you in your dotage...

With much love,
Lisa

14 comments:

Rebecca said...

Great layout! Mitch does look very grown up.
Hang in there Lisa, you know your boys are bright and happy and will get there in the end with the speech.

Anonymous said...

tomorrow morning my darling, you and Kev and the boys get up - you then say "fuck them" what would those talking heads know, I am the mother and I trust my instincts.
Then remember that Uncle John was predicted by the talking heads to spend his life in a wheelchair, were it not for his mother's belief!
The Captain (AKA Uncle Milcum)

Scrapbooking 4 Less said...

Hi LIsa,

Gorgeous Layout, I love these pics of Mitch and the colours are brilliant. I'm sorry to hear that you are having major dramas with the boys Speech therapist, good luck with it all!
Sending big hugs your way!

Take Care,
Shelley
www.scrapbooking4less.com.au
Check out our Forum!

Aprilyn said...

Lisa,
I'm so sorry to hear of your continued struggles. It's so difficult when you get conflicting information.
How deep is the water in your pool? Can you take them and just let them wade or will they just run away? I'm guessing that's why it's difficult to manage 2 of them at the pool. Marshall LOVES water and we are paying for him to have private swimming lessons. It's made a huge difference and we've only had 3 lessons so far.
As for the sleeping problem...have you considered trying Melatonin? We use it on Marshall and it relaxes him enough to fall asleep which is SO nice. It just doesn't KEEP him asleep so we had to add a time release kind of Melatonin called Rozerum. Good luck Lisa. I wish I could be of more help. I'd LOVE to go with you to the pool or beach..if only I didn't live so darn far away!

Jenn said...

My dear Lisa,
YOU are doing a fantastic job with those boys, and I think, in the end, thats what counts the most. Mitch and Harry are very special boys, and we always knew they would be. We (you and Kev, and those you have travelled and shared this journey with) also always knew there would be struggles along the way. All you can do, which I know you already do, is take each day at a time and tackle the little things you CAN manage.
I don't know the therapists you are seeing, but from experience I would tend to listen more to the one who has seen the boys more and for longer.
I just wish I was there, living closer, to be a shoulder for you, like you have been for me so many times.
Love you heaps
Jenn

Lisa - Mum to Mitch & Harry said...

Thanks Bec,
Hanging on tight :-)
Hugs,
Lisa

Lisa - Mum to Mitch & Harry said...

Thanks Uncle Milcum :-)
Yeah fuck 'em is right!
They don't realise how determined he is to get his message across and how determined we are to give him every opportunity he needs.
Hugs,
Lisa

Lisa - Mum to Mitch & Harry said...

Thanks Shelley,
Appreciate your love and support.
Lisa

Lisa - Mum to Mitch & Harry said...

Dear Aprilyn,
Have you ever though of moving to Australia? (grin). Thanks again for your understanding and support.
Hugs,
Lisa

Lisa - Mum to Mitch & Harry said...

Dear Jenn,
We took a vote in our family and we want you to move back home! We miss you. Thanks for being such a good friend.
Lisa

Anonymous said...

Dear Lisa,

My heart is so heavy for you. How I miss you! Wish I could be there to support you through this time.

You are a wonderful mum. Your boys are so blessed to have you (even if they see you in a bathing suit!). God knew that you would be the best mum for them, and that you are! What a dedicated loving mum you are, seeking to help the boys in any way that you can. Many children do not know that blessing.

From here, all I can do is pray. I pray that God will strengthen, guide and sustain you as you tackle this merry-go-round. Yes, each day brings it's challenges, but remember, you are not alone!

Love ya lots,
Big hugs,
Andrea

Anonymous said...

Hi Lisa,

Now in my "dotage" I actually don't give a ---- about what anyone thinks about me and nothing will come back to haunt me :-) Why? because I know, deep within myself, that I've always done my best. If people don't agree with this, then that's for them to deal with. That's how it was for my much loved mum, your nana and works for me.

In my experience, both as a mother and a teacher, most "experts" are simply "drips under pressure". We listen to what they have to say, weigh it all up and then make our own decision. It's worked for me.

Parenting is never easy and is beset with incredible challenges which never end until we're finally "laid to rest". phew ...

I know that you and Kevin will go on making decisions that are "right" for your precious little boys. Not easy, I know.

Much xxx always,
Auntie Catherine.

Lisa - Mum to Mitch & Harry said...

Thanks Andrea,
For your love, support and prayers.
Lisa

Lisa - Mum to Mitch & Harry said...

Dear Auntie Catherine,
Thank you for understanding our struggles. With the beneift of a few days the diagnosis seems less dire and we are ready to move forward.

Hugs,
Lisa