Monday, November 10, 2008
Turning 40 and other milestones...
Well I am on the countdown to my fortieth birthday. It is hard to believe that I am actually going to be forty! In some ways I still feel like I am in my twenties, until I look in a mirror and see an older, more wrinkled face looking back at me. There is certainly a freedom in growing older. I worry a lot less about what people think. I am kinder to myself and hopefully to others. I am less judgemental of others. And I allow myself time to smell the roses. Of course the aches a pains which weren't there 20 years ago remind me now and then that my body has aged.... but I have to say that I like growing older.
Life is good. Mitch & Harry are growing into beautiful boys with loving hearts. They are making new friends and enjoying kindy. And even the hurdles we face with both of them don't seem insurmountable. Kev is enjoying his work. He is a loving husband, a doting father and a good provider. Our home is comfortable and welcoming. And we have good family and friends.
The one hardship is that I don't have my beautiful Mum to share this time. The pain of her death never really goes away. I know how much she would have loved to be part of the family gatherings and how she would have loved to spend time with her three grandsons. Harry in particular talks about his Gran often. I realise he wouldn't have a particularly strong memory of her, but he gets comfort from seeing photos of her and talking to me about his Gran. Everything in my life has been touched in some small way by my Mum and this is what gives me comfort. I feel blessed to have had such a beautiful Mum.
So life is good. I look forward to the next forty years! And as I look of the photo of me as a little girl I wish I could say to her that life may get tough at times, but there are enough sweet moments to make the journey worthwhile.
Hoping everyone has a great week,
With lots of love,