It's hard to believe, but three years ago Mitchell & Harrison were almost two weeks old and were struggling to survive. Every day I would drive the 45mins to visit them in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit and would pray that I wouldn't be greeted by more bad news. Each day seemed to bring more challenges as the boys faced surgeries, procedures and infections. BUT somehow they finally came home - due in part to the wonderful caring medical and nursing staff at the hospital and also (I believe) due to sheer luck. Each birthday I always find myself transported back to those early months when we didn't know what the future held. I relive those memories and spill tears for all that our precious baby boys endured. I also cry for the lost dreams and for what may have been. It may sound terribly indulgent, but there is a part of me that still grieves for the loss of my pregnancy at such and early stage, that I never got to enjoy those last months of nesting and preparing the nursery and mostly, that Kev never got to feel his baby boys kicking...
And then I look at how far we have come. How these tiny little babies are now young boys with minds of their own, who know what they want to do (even when Mummy tries to convince them otherwise) and who are making friends. I am so grateful for the boys' social skills - that they are loving and caring and that they are confident and chatty (even if Mummy is not always sure what they are saying). Mitch who loves duplo, cuddles and his special sheet. Harry who has a great sense of humour, loves puzzles and drawing. These precious little boys who give so much love and only want a cuddle or someone to read them a book. I am in awe of their strength and their determination...
I don't know what I did to deserve such unconditional love - but I will be forever grateful for this precious gift...
I love you Mitchell Steven & Harrison Adam,
Mummy
8 comments:
Happy Birthday for the other day Mitch and Harry hope you had lots of fun at your party.
You have a great mum this entry nearly made me cry.
Scrapbook Sharon
Thank you for reading my blog.
Hugs,
Lisa
Mitch and Harry are looking great! Happy (belated) third birthday to them both. I feel the exact same way with my boys. The loss of those last months of pregnancy, the dreams, the hopes, the *normalcy*....it's all like a bit of a grieving process. After a 30 wkr and then a 25 wkr, I go through the same emotions every June. My boys have the exact same birthday, two years apart, so the emotions come flooding back all at the same time.
Your boys are thriving because of what a wonderful mommy you are. It's good to get that grieving in because we did loose a part of our motherhood. (((HUGS)))
It's incredibly comforting that all of us 'preemie moms' know exactly what everyone has gone through, and that we can all express ourselves in different ways, give different words for the same situations. The grief, the loss of 'normal', the guilt, the constant balance of becoming obsessive or being careful...Nobody else can quite understand it.
And yet we have so much to be thankful for, for our precious, brave babies, for all we have learned, for the patience that we have developed (most of the time *grin*).
Happy Happy Birthday Mitch and Harry. You have a super mum.
Thanks Kellie for reading my blog.
Hugs,
Lisa
Dear Leanne,
Thank you for reading my blog.
Hugs,
Lisa
I want to say a HUGE (and belated - sorry) Happy Birthday to the wonderfully spectacular boys aka Mitch and Harry.
I am in awe of their achievements and think, as so many have said, it all would not have been possible without the very special love they have from their mum and dad, Lisa and Kev.
Big hugs and bigger kisses,
Love Jodi, Mick and Thomas
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Thanks Jode, Mick & Tom.
Hugs,
Lisa
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